I was in the grocery store today, and began to turn down the aisle. I happened to spot a little (not even 5 feet tall) old lady pushing her cart at the other end of the aisle. I watched her try to reach the top shelf to get some peanuts in a glass jar. She was reaching and reaching, but just couldn't make it.

I'm of course beginning to push my cart at the speed of sound to get down there and help her. But before I could, I watched THREE MEN look at her reaching, turn away, and keep shopping. What the hell? I got down there and said, "Could you use some help?" "Oh yes," the cute little old lady replied. I grabbed a jar of peanuts for her. She immediately shook her head in disapproval--those were not on sale. She wanted the ones to the left. I grabbed those for her instead. She was so appreciative.

I continued on my shopping journey, but I couldn't help feeling angry.

I'm a proud female. I can do things for myself. I'm going to be an attorney soon and can and will hold my own with men. I can open a door for myself. BUT, that doesn't mean that I don't APPRECIATE it when a man offers to help me. I still get scared walking to my car alone--offer to walk us, fellas. I always say "thank you" when a guy opens a door or walks me to my car. I don't expect it from a man, but I sure am grateful when it happens.

Maybe "feminism" has scared a lot of men away from the traditional gestures of chivalry. But today's little incident was just RUDENESS. Maybe what I'm griping about is just about common decency and not chivalry.

Hell, maybe I'm just warped. My dad still stands up at the table when a woman gets up or approaches. No guy I have gone out on a date with has EVER done that.

Is it contradictory to ask to be treated equally yet ask to be treated with a little chivalry? Maybe it is.

Posted by Lawren at January 16, 2004 08:02 PM

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