Fun With Names

--Not sure about the neglected part!!

Found over at Bitch Country.

Jen Wants More in Bed?

Jennifer Aniston says she keeps her marriage to Brad Pitt fresh by fantasising about swinging.

The Sun says Jennifer, 35, would let her 40-year-old husband bed Michelle Pfeiffer, 47.

But that would only be if she were allowed to bed 56-year-old Steven Tyler from Aerosmith.
---------------
She has Brad freakin' Pitt and she wants to get it on with Steven Tyler? Oh lord.

Scarlett's Sexual Encounters

We heard about Scarlett Johanssen getting freaky with Benicio del Toro in an elevator.

We heard about Scarlett shamelessly flirting with Heath Ledger and Naomi Watts dumping him for it.

Now there is a new tale in Scarlett's sexual revolution: girl on girl action. Some jaws dropped the other night when rising starlet Scarlett Johansson engaged in some heavy kissing. According to reports, Scarlett's lips were attacked by Imitation of Christ designer Tara Subkoff, who was possibly caught "imitating a lesbian" at the Maritime Hotel's Hiro bar.

Indy 500

In honor of the greatest spectacle in racing being held in my town today, here is some track trivia for you.

Layover Treat

For those of you ever traveling through the Indianapolis airport: if you have some time, you should stop by the Indianapolis International Airport spa, called Passport.

Passport has been at the airport about two years and is the first outlet for a company started by a New York woman who travels a lot and wished she could find spa services in an airport.

It opened as a nail salon, but now provides a variety of services, including hairstyling and massage, said Laurel Fleming, on-site manager.

Buffyologist Conference

It's tough for scholars to be taken seriously when their subject is a TV show about a California blonde fighting evil in a high school built on a gateway to hell--Particularly when the title is as campy as "Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

Buffyologists from as far away as Singapore were presenting 190 papers on topics ranging from "slayer slang" to "postmodern reflections on the culture of consumption" to "Buffy and the new American Buddhism."

I didn't even think that many people watched that show. Sounds like it has a Trekkie-like following.

I'm Connected

Broadcasting live from my new condo. Sorry for the blog delays--I haven't had internet for a few days! Every bone in my body hurts from my move. But, I'm so pumped. The place is so cute, if I do say so myself. Can't wait to entertain!

:)

Brad and Jen Ditch "Troy"

Hollywood hunk Brad Pitt caused outrage at the Cannes Film Festival last week - by walking out of the official screening of his film "Troy" before it had started.

The 40-year-old actor got up and left the cinema with his Friends star wife Jennifer Aniston before the lights went down. A horrified witness says, "It is almost unprecedented not to watch your own film at Cannes. Their vacant seats did not go unnoticed".

Are there any rumors as to why they left?

Gay-Themed Reality Show Canned

Fox Television has dropped plans to air a controversial two-hour reality show where two straight men were to be shown competing for a $50,000 prize by trying to fool people -- including their close friends -- into thinking they're gay.

Fox President Gail Berman decided to pull "Seriously, Dude, I'm Gay" from the network's schedule following concerns raised by the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation.

If the substance was harmful, I'm glad it got canned. But, couldn't they have at least tried to pick a better title?

Closing

I close on my condo today at noon. Wish me luck! My first new house!

Quite a Change

From Manolos to chinos:

Sarah Jessica Parker tapped to be the Gap's new pitchwoman in print and TV ads through the rest of the year. It's the longest-running endorsement deal signed by the clothing manufacturer yet.

What would Carrie think?

Wedding Weight Watchers

A Hobart couple that plans to wed on Sept. 4 have been chosen to participate in "Dateline NBC's Bridal Weight Loss Challenge."

Courtney Prathaftakis, 22, a Rochester native, and her fiance, Nate Sass, 23, will try to lose weight with help from a sports doctor. Her goal is to lose 50 pounds, while he will try to lose 30.

NBC correspondent Sarah James interviews the brides. NBC will air a show in late November or early December on the participants' weddings and their weight loss.

Prathaftakis and Sass both weighed in at 228 pounds at the start. They have begun working out for a couple months and have joined Weight Watchers.
---------
This isn't too surprising since I remember reading a while back that Indiana is one of the top 5 most obese states. Good luck to the couple!

You Know You've Made It When...

...you're waxed.

Beyonce Knowles is the latest pop star to be immortalized in wax in the new interactive singing and dancing "Divas" section at Madam Tussauds in London. The former Destiny's Child is featured next to fellow singers Kylie Minogue and Britney Spears for the new exhibit which allows visitors to get up on stage and give their best Kylie, Britney or Beyonce impersonation.

I Love the 80's

You're a Speak & Spell!! You nerd, you. Just
because you were disguised as a toy doesn't
mean you weren't educational, you sneaky
bastard.


What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hat tip to Gigglechick.

Broadway Update

Laura Linney got rave reviews for her Broadway performance last night in "Sight Unseen."

Says the reviewer: Even when "Sight Unseen" seems a little slight or muddled, there's Linney to pull it out of the mud and set it straight again. If you're coming to New York in the next few weeks, this is a must-see production.

I can't wait to see her in her new movie, "Kinsey." She co-stars with Liam Neeson in Bill Condon's movie about sexpert doctors.

I honestly think she is one of THE most talented actresses out there today. I loved her in "The Truman Show," "Love Actually," "The Life of David Gale," "Primal Fear," "You Can Count on Me," and the list goes on and on. She keeps me enraptured from the moment she's on screen. I only hope I can someday see her on stage as well.

Bar Review

Thoughts on my bar review session today:

The speaker looked like a young Hume Cronyn--like when he was in "Shadow of a Doubt." The speaker also kept pronouncing "possessory" as "puh-sess-er-ar-y." It was annoying.

Brief Invention

This week's most unique invention award goes to: The Brief Safe

The "Brief Safe" is an innovative new diversion safe that can secure your cash, documents, and other small valuables from inquisitive eyes and thieving hands, both at home and when you're traveling.

Items can be hidden right under their noses with these specially-designed briefs which contain a fly-accessed 4" x 10" secret compartment with Velcro closure and "special markings" on the lower rear portion.

Leave the "Brief Safe" in plain view in your laundry basket or washing machine at home, or in your suitcase in a hotel room - even the most hardened burgler or most curious snoop will "skid" to a screeching halt as soon as they see them. (Wouldn't you?) To add realistic smell, check out "Doo Drops."

Hat tip to Geoffrey.

The Return of Andy Kaufman?

I found the following over at Waiting for the Punchline:

Andy Kaufman, as some would have you believe, is alive and well. The comic claimed that he would fake his own death and return 20 years later, which would have been May 16th of this year.

An Andy Kaufman Returns blog has appeared, hosted of course by Blogspot. The blog claims that the author is the real Andy Kaufman and has various posts claiming that he has been confirmed by a DNA test. Yet, the obvious question "why don't you go on national TV to prove it" is dismissed by saying that he wants to remain on a more personal and intimate level. He says to look for him at Wal-Marts and Starbucks around the country and to contact local media when you do.

I'm skeptical. What do you guys think? Is he dead or alive?

Germy Ties

Doctors may be unwittingly spreading infections through their ties, warn US researchers. The New York Hospital Queens team found nearly half of the ties worn by medical workers harboured disease-causing bacteria.

Almost half (47.6%) of the ties worn by clinicians were found to harbour bacteria that can cause disease.

Open Wide

Cyndi Lauper was reaching for a high note during her opening number at Saturday's KISS-108-sponsored concert in Mansfield, Mass., when from the sky came a white glob of bird poop.

The fecal critique landed in her open mouth.

Maybe birds just wanna have fun.

Save the Chicken

Here's what the extrememly bored Hollywood stars are up to:

Comedian Adam Sandler has backed a campaign to halt the closure of a Malibu, California, chicken store - a favorite of such stars as Meg Ryan, Pierce Brosnan and Barbra Streisand.

After eight years in the business, small surf eatery Malibu Chicken - which also caters to Sylvester Stallone, Dennis Quaid and Jim Carey - may have to close as early as the summer because the lease is up and Chabad, the organization which owns the building, wants them out.

A petition drive has been started to save Malibu Chicken, and nearly 2,000 people, including Sandler, have signed it.

Snoop's Single

Snoop Dogg is gettin' the big divizzle.

Rapper Snoop Dogg has filed for divorce from his wife of nearly seven years, Shante Broadus. "Celebrity Justice" has obtained the petition for dissolution of marriage, filed on Friday in Los Angeles. Snoop Dogg, real name Calvin Broadus, cites "irreconcilable differences" as the reason for the split. The petition also requests joint custody of the couple's three children, Corde, Cordell and Cori.

Moi

As promised, here is your weekly dose of "Random Facts About Lawren."

I took piano lessons when I was a kid. I think I took for about 7 years. In the end, sports, voice, and other activities won out, but I still really enjoyed piano. Learning how to read music greatly helped my ability to be a decent singer.

My piano teacher was great, and she taught most of the "promising" pianists in my small town. She, of course, would drill the classics in to our heads. I, on the other hand, had a fascination with pop music and oldies music. I would beg and plead with her every week to let me expand my horizons.

Finally, my whining paid off, and she allowed me to play one classical piece and one piece of my choosing each week. I was so pumped. It was fun to have "Heaven is a Place on Earth" as a diversion from Fur Elise.

When it came time for our yearly recitals, she let us pick what we wanted to play. All the other little goody goodies signed up to play their most difficult classical pieces. Not me. Why would I want to sound like everyone else? I knew I could handle the classical jazz, so why not spice things up a bit, right?

Picture it: Lots of young kids in their Sunday best, diligently filling the music hall with Beethoven, Bach, and Handel. My teacher walks on stage and says: "And now we'll hear two pieces from fourth grader Lawren Mills. She will be playing "Close My Eyes Forever" by Lita Ford and Ozzy Osbourne and "Carrie" by Europe." All the parents looked so confused. But I played my little heart out. And when I was done, I found my parents, and they were clapping. They were laughing, but they were clapping too.

Now THAT's an Ad

Yet another reason why I think the people at HBO, more specifically, the creative minds behind "Six Feet Under" are second to none (billboard in L.A.):

Jewel's 'Tude

Sounds like Jewel had some major 'tude at her most recent concert:

Witnesses at the concert said Jewel went on a tirade of insults from poking fun at fat people to others with no teeth. At one point, she asked the audience to yell requests and then told them to "shut the hell up."

"People were literally walking out of the show," she said. "As soon as she came out, she began to insult us. We thought she was joking at first because it was kind of weird."

Dion said Jewel stopped in the middle of her trademark song, "Who will save your soul," because everyone was singing along. "She said, ‘I would have never guessed you all know the words.’ I don’t know if she was kidding or what."

Common Resume Blunders

6 common resume mistakes to beware of.

Bar Review

Bar review starts today. So not excited. As a result, I'll try to get some posts up in the mornings before I go, but I may not get anything up until the afternoons.

Happy Monday!

How Good Was It?

How freaking good was "Sopranos" tonight?

Buh Bye, A.

Greasy Thief

A slippery thief is on the loose in Edmond, where police say nearly 5,000 pounds of used cooking grease has been stolen from three restaurants.

Question: is it worth carrying 5,000 pounds of grease for only a resale value of $380? I'm thinking not.

The Diddy Has 12 Faces

P. Diddy: ex-boyfriend of J Lo, rapper, entrepreneur, fashion designer, Broadway star, and now...

Fragrance developer.

Estee Lauder is planning to create and market a new line of fragrances under the rapper's Sean John name.

The man is a $$ powerhouse.

Still Alive

Yes, I'm still alive. Has been a crazy weekend. Normal posting will resume later today, I promissimo!

:)

Stars Race to Murder Scene

A Diamond District merchant linked to a money-laundering scheme was shot and killed execution-style in the busy heart of midtown last night, police said.
Eduard Nektalov, 46, whose family owns Roman Jewelry, was walking up Sixth Ave. when a silent gunman pumped two bullets into his back and one into his head, sources said. The shooting occurred just a half-block north of Diamond Way - W. 47th St.

"It looks like a hit," said one top-ranking police source. "This was an assassination."

In a stranger-than-fiction twist, TV stars Candice Bergen and Lorraine Bracco, who were serving as honorary police commanders for the day, raced to the crime scene with cops.

Perhaps this will inspire a new cop drama a la "Cagney and Lacey"--"Bracco and Bergen" has a nice ring to it.

And the Winner Is...

I give a big, fat, "DUH" to this recent report:

In the gore stakes, Janet Leigh's shower scene in "Psycho" is the "best movie death" of all time, according to a critics' poll published Thursday.

The 44-year-old Hitchcock thriller beat other iconic movies such as "The Godfather" and Quentin Tarantino's "Reservoir Dogs" (23rd) in the poll by Total Film magazine. Stanley Kubrick's "Dr Strangelove Or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb" (1964) came second, with the surreal ending when Slim Pickens rides an atomic bomb.

"Some of the deaths in the poll, like The Wicked Witch melting in 'The Wizard Of Oz' (13th), are iconic but laughable, but nearly 45 years on, 'Psycho's' shower scene is still distressing," said Total Film deputy editor Simon Crook.

"It's the sheer violence of the edit rather than any explicit gore — 70 different angles, over 90 cuts and those shrieking violins. It's a masterclass in montage and audience manipulation." Crook added: "Knowing that the blood is Bosco's chocolate syrup and that a pulped casaba melon stood in for the stabbing noises does nothing to reduce the impact."
----------------------
I mean, did anyone doubt that? Hitchcock is the master--always has been and always will be. For those of you who don't know, I am a Hitchcock buff--have been ever since middle school. I own almost every Hitchcock movie. He was a genius and NO director--EVER--will surpass his inventiveness in the thriller genre. Yes, I said EVER.

Product Review

I bought the best product last week at Saks. It's a new Bobbi Brown product called the Shimmer Brick. You dust a little on over bronzer and/or blush to give your skin an amazing glow. Not a "I just put glitter on my face" glow, but a subtle "I have suntouched skin" glow.

The 5 stripes blend well together and can be used separately as eye shadow. It's the perfect summer must-have, in my opinion.

Apple of Her Eye

Gwyneth received one as a gift after her baby, Apple, came.

Anatomy of an Autopsy

Because my father is a pathologist, I found this site to be extremely interesting. It outlines, in detail, the process of an autopsy.

Does anyone read those Patricia Cornwell books featuring forensic pathologist Kay Scarpetta? LOVE 'em!!

LFB 4 GWB?

Lara Flynn Boyle is still anti-food, but she's pro-Bush.

Representatives for George W. Bush are hoping to recruit actress Lara Flynn Boyle for campaigning duties, after she publicly declared her support for the American President.

The former star of "The Practice," 34, has gone against the grain of a large number of her Hollywood counterparts to pledge her support for the Republican leader. She says, "I'm Irish Catholic, so a Democrat by blood. But I'm 100 per cent for Bush. I want my president to be like my agent: not afraid of people, but wants my best interest." And a Bush spokesman has welcomed the news, telling Us Weekly, "If she's amenable, obviously we would try to find something interesting and useful for her to do."

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Well you're Happy, yes thats right your so happy, so
pretty and witty and if i go on any more i will
have to pay for the rights of this song so,
great jop your one of the lucky ones.


What Emotion Dominates you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Jello--Not just for kids anymore

Jello pitch-man Bill Cosby may not approve, but gelatin-shots aren't just for college kids anymore.

Sharon L. Calhoon is the co-author of a new recipe book all about gelatin shots titled "Jiggelo." Jello shooters aren't just for college kids. Serious connoisseurs will enjoy the "Panda Antics," which contains green tea, sake, gelatin and a gummy bear for decoration.

Other boozehounds may prefer the "Cradle" -- an African-inspired shot containing pineapple gelatin, peanut butter, rum and Tabasco Sauce.

Calhoon's son came up with the recipes, and not all go down smoothly. One drink that leaves some boozehounds sour is the "Haze," which uses ouzo, Everclear and cherry gelatin. But, in her words, "Sometimes you want a nasty jiggelo."

This story reminds me of when I lived in Chicago and I took my mom to a restaurant/bar called the "Mashed Potato Club." It was a fun, crazy place that had hundreds of--you guessed it--mashed potatos on the menu, and had a drag show every night. Anyway, the waiters bring around jello shots for everyone during the show. They brought some for my mom and me. I downed mine. Mom, not knowing what the hell to do with it, got a spoon and actually started eating it like a jello cup. I started laughing and showed her how it was done.

Lovitz a Stud?

Janice Dickinson of "America's Top Model" claims to have had sex with everyone from Jack Nicholson to Warren Beatty -- but do you know who she thinks beats them all? Jon Lovitz.

That's who she's dating now. She tells the New York Daily News that Lovitz is "one hot stud muffin." Dickinson says Lovitz is "the sexiest man alive, " and he "makes my liver quiver and my heart pound."

He has every guy wondering what his secret is.

Cry Me a River

Antonio Banderas was so moved while watching his eagerly-anticipated new movie Shrek 2 with Justin Timberlake, he ended up sobbing and holding hands with the pop hunk.

The Spanish actor viewed the animated film at France's Cannes Film Festival last week as he sat in between Timberlake and the 'N Sync star's girlfriend Cameron Diaz, who also adds her vocals to the production. Banderas says, "I was kind of crying at the end of the thing.

It was kinda funny because there's is a very romantic moment at the end of the movie. My character says, 'I wanna cry,' and I was crying. Cameron Diaz was (to the left) and Justin Timberlake was (to the right), and he said to me, 'I'm crying too!' So we held hands for a while.

WTF? It's "Shrek," people. If they were watching "Schindler's List," maybe I'd understand.

Tony Randall Dies

Tony Randall, the comic actor known for playing lovably prissy characters, has died. He was 84.

Another gem lost. They just don't make them like that anymore. I adored him after seeing him play Jonathan Forbes in "Pillow Talk" with Rock and Doris.

You're Annette Benning

I just caught this past weekend's "Sopranos" episode last night. And, I must admit--I LOVED it! I thought it was so different, so introspective, and so thought-provoking.

Lori, and many of her readers, disagree. (This is rare b/c Lori and I are usually on the same page).

Just wondered what some of you thought.

Rat Aid

Just about every method of detecting land mines has a drawback. Metal detectors cannot tell a mine from a tenpenny nail. Armored bulldozers work well only on level ground. Mine-sniffing dogs get bored, and if they make mistakes, they get blown up.

The Gambian giant pouched rat has a drawback, too: It has trouble getting down to work on Monday mornings. Other than that, it may be as good a mine detector as man or nature has yet devised.

Just after sunup on one dewy morning, on a football field-sized patch of earth in the Mozambican countryside, Frank Weetjens and his squad of 16 giant pouched rats are proving it. Outfitted in tiny harnesses and hitched to 10-yard clotheslines, their footlong tails whipping to and fro, the rats lope up and down the lines, whiskers twitching, noses tasting the air.

Here's the rest of the story...

Think Pink

Attention male MTS readers: Think Pink.

Pink is the new blue. For men, that is. Ironic but true, this girlish shade is popping up everywhere, from the boardroom to casual parties to magazine layouts.

Billionaire Donald Trump wore a shiny pink tie with a dark business suit on his hit reality-TV show, "The Apprentice," last month. And hip-hop artist Andre Benjamin of OutKast wore a pink-and-white checked shirt and green polka-dot bow tie in the "50 Most Beautiful" issue of People magazine. The weekly describes the rapper as someone "who's comfortable wearing saddle shoes, pearl bracelets and plenty of pink."

Shake Your Groove Thing

So I just checked my stats. I found that someone stumbled upon my blog by performing the following search: where to buy vibrating condoms.

Sorry. Won't find any of those here. Do they even make those?

And in the Hoosier state...

...some Taylor University students are waiting to learn whether they've set a new world leapfrogging record.

On Saturday, 927 students and staff at the central Indiana college lined up along the campus loop and leaped over each other in pursuit of a new Guinness World Record.

The current record stands at 850 students playing the game for more than five minutes -- a record held by a school in England, university officials said. Taylor students exceeded that record by 77 people, said Taylor spokesman Jim Garringer.

Guess the kids at Taylor are just that bored.

Shoo Fly Shoe

Shoo fly shoe swatter...

How cute are these? I just HAD to buy one!

Breakin' Out

Screen beauty Cameron Diaz had a skin-care crisis at the Cannes Film Festival this weekend - when her face broke out in acne.

The "Charlie's Angels" stunner was in the French city to attend the premiere of animation sequel Shrek 2 and had to call in her beauty experts to correct the unsightly blemishes.

Wish I had a round-the-clock zit popper.

Soytini Anyone?

Jermaine Dupri has become an owner of Chicago-based 3 Vodka, the only vodka that is distilled from soy. "3 Vodka is representative of what I look for in a brand - from the inside out, it’s a flawless product," Dupri said in a statement.

Soy vodka? Needless to say, I'm a bit skeptical.

Moving Fun

Well the moving fun has begun. I have a feeling that's what is going to consume the bulk of my time the next 2 weeks. Movers are coming to take my heavy stuff tomorrow, so I'll be without a bed for the next few weeks, but I have my trusty futon.

I've been packing for the last 5 hours and making trips to the new place, but I still feel like I haven't even made a dent. I'm also trying to clean as I go, so everything will be nice when I bring it over there. Swiffer dusters are my new best friend.

Rutti Tutti Fresh and Fruity

No she didn't...

Gwyneth Paltrow gave birth to a baby girl she named Apple.

Apple? Apple Martin? Add and "i" on the end and I'll want to drink her.

Sing, Sing a Song

I decided to rent "School of Rock" last night on PPV while I was writing thank you notes from graduation. I really thought it was cute. Worth an Oscar? No way. But I think its message is a good one--arts programs in schools are OH SO important.

I took all the AP classes I was supposed to--Calculus, English Lit, etc. Spent hours studying chemistry and physics. But the skills I acquired from heavily integrating music (piano lessons, voice lessons, parts in musicals, master classes, etc.) in my life are some of the most drawn-upon for me today. The leadership skills and self-confidence skills I developed during my musical endeavors are strong.

I wrote a music scholarship essay in high school and ended with this quote: I will not be successful because of my talents IN music, but I will be successful because of my talents FROM music. I stand by that statement today. And, that is partially why I donate (hopefully it will be more once I start practicing law) to the VH1 Save the Music Program and to my local high school's music department.

Inappropriate Isn't EVEN the Word

I hope something really awful happens to these two:

Two Portland disc jockeys were fired from a local radio station after playing an audiotape of the beheading of American Nick Berg (search) by Iraqi militants, and cracking jokes about the grisly death.

Me

I've gotten a few emails/complaints that I should start posting things about myself that people don't know.

So, I decided to occasionally let you guys know a little more about me.

Today's LKM funfact: My middle name is Key. It is my grandmother's maiden name, and we are related (distantly, obviously) to Francis Scott Key.

Frasier Has Left the Building

I'm sad to see "Frasier" go. I think it was one of the most intelligent and witty shows on television. I LOVED how they occasionally incorporated Lillith--she's one of my favorites.

I saw "Dateline" this week recounting the lives of the characters and the show. Kelsey really seems to finally be at peace with his inner demons. The cast talked about how they staged an "intervention" after his car accident, and went to his house, hoping to save him. They all seem really close.

Was anyone else disappointed that he didn't end up with Roz? I was.

Or Something?

I know the story about Scarlett and Benecio's "love in an elevator" broke a few days ago, but would someone explain her quote to me:

"We were making out or having sex or something, which I think is very unsanitary," she said.

Minor Miscalculation

Though "Friends" would prove to be a lucrative ratings powerhouse, the sitcom's pilot received a failing grade and was described as "not very entertaining, clever, or original," according to an internal NBC research report obtained by The Smoking Gun.

Bet the author wishes he could retract those statements now. Oops.

Women of Home Depot

We had the "Women of Enron" issue.

We had the "Women of Wal-Mart" issue.

And now... (drumroll please)

Playboy.com says it is seeking female employees of the largest home improvement chain to "shuck their orange smocks and show their hardware." Yes, here comes the "Women of Home Depot."

Model Citizen

Former Baywatch star Pamela Anderson is trying for US citizenship, her lawyer has confirmed.

Anderson, 36, was born in British Columbia, Canada.

She underwent a citizenship interview in Los Angeles on Wednesday. "If she passes, she gets sworn in," said her lawyer, Barbara Federman.

I've heard the citizenship test is actually pretty difficult. It would be hysterical if she flunked!

The Shining

Here's an ode to a great movie--bunny style. The voices alone made me laugh.

Shamelessly stolen from M@.

I Fall To Pieces

Hot Look For Spring:

Here's one way to keep it all together—just go to pieces. As the sum of its parts, patchwork is a whole lot of look. Its floaty forms can satisfy those who fancy themselves bohemian. Its assemblage pleases anyone who likes intricate handcrafting. Judged squarely and chosen wisely, the angularity of patchwork can be niftily figure-flattering.

WTF?

A woman who drank rat urine to nourish her kidneys has reportedly ended up in hospital with swollen breasts.

Did she need a negative side-effect to turn her off from the rat urine?

Make it Last

Attention: For those of you who love your coffee as much as I do:

A cup of coffee first thing in the morning is an essential part of the daily routine for many people. But a new study suggests that it may be better to stretch out the daily dose by drinking smaller amounts throughout the day.

She Changes Her Mind Like I Change My Clothes

Serial monogamist Jennifer Lopez has reportedly gotten engaged to new love Marc Anthony - only three months after splitting from ex-fiance Ben Affleck.

According to American tabloid New York Post, the "Maid In Manhattan" star has given Affleck back her pink diamond engagement ring and is flashing a new jewel from Anthony. A friend says, "She is wearing a huge diamond ring on the middle finger of her left hand. It is a diamond band with a huge square clear diamond in the middle and the square diamond is surrounded by more tiny diamonds. It is an engagement ring."

My Lord. Is she trying to go for some record? I'm starting to think she just likes to wear amazing jewelry, and when she decides she wants something new, she trades in her man AND the ring, for a new one.

Way too Chipper

My bar review instructor is WAY too chipper. Picture Sandy Duncan as an aerobics instructor. The voice. The incessant smiling. The enthusiasm. It's just too much for me in the morning.

Choose Your Own Adventure: NYC

Did anyone else LOVE those "Choose Your Own Adventure" books like I did when I was younger? Well, here's an online version for New York City.

If You Want to Destroy My Sweater

How bored is this chick?

Broadway Update

TV talk show host Wayne Brady is joining the cast of the long-running Broadway musical revival "Chicago" as the opportunistic Billy Flynn.

While I think Brady has a great voice, I hope he can get down the suave nature of the character.

Monday, Monday

Bar review starts this morning, so I will blog about yesterday and anything else this afternoon.

Hope your Monday mornings are stress-free! :)

Graduation

I graduate today. Blogging will commence tomorrow.

Pray I don't trip on stage. :)

Quiz

Sex Machine

Attention!!!

BMW drivers have more sex than owners of any other cars and are much more active than Porsche drivers, a new German car magazine has found.

The German magazine "Men's Car" found in a survey of 2,253 motorists aged 20 to 50 published in its inaugural May issue that male BMW drivers say they have sex on average 2.2 times each week while Porsche drivers have sex 1.4 times per week.

Following BMW drivers were Audi (2.1), Volkswagen (1.9), Ford (1.7) and Mercedes (1.6). Drivers of foreign car makes were also behind BMW with Italian cars (2.0), French (1.9), Japanese (1.8), Swedish (1.6) and Korean cars (1.5) trailing after.

Among women, French car drivers were top with 2.1 times per week followed by Audi (2.0), Italian (2.0), and BMW (1.9) with Porsche again at the bottom of the scale at 1.2 times per week.

It's All in the Name

Emily again topped the list of most popular baby girl names last year, registering as No. 1 for the eighth straight time. Jacob led among names for boys for the fourth year in a row.

Three more biblical names followed Jacob for the boys: Michael, Joshua and Matthew. For girls, Emma, Madison and Hannah came after Emily, which has been the most popular female name since 1996.

Rounding out the top 10 for girls, in order, were Olivia, Abigail, Alexis, Ashley, Elizabeth and Samantha.

The list for boys continued with Andrew, Joseph, Ethan, Daniel, Christopher and Anthony.

Last Night

I had a good night last night. Our Dean hosted a very nice cocktail reception at Woodstock Country Club for the Class of 2004. It was nice to talk to some of the professors for the last time.

Then, the gang and I went to dinner/dessert (depending on what you were craving).

After that, Adam and Cahill, fellow 3Ls, had a little shindig at their place. It was a very good time. We even got some dancing in. Nothing like a little "Baby Got Back," "Livin' on a Prayer," and "2 Legit 2 Quit" to get the party going.

As we were all dancing, singing, and laughing, I chuckled at how interesting was that we were all acting like that, but would be all serious wearing our doctoral stripes on Sunday.

That's the way it should be I think--work hard and play hard.

Reason #4,865 Why Michael Moore is a Jackass

Less than 24 hours after accusing the Walt Disney Company of pulling the plug on his latest documentary in a blatant attempt at political censorship, the rabble-rousing film-maker Michael Moore has admitted he knew a year ago that Disney had no intention of distributing it.

Just in case anyone had any doubt what a lying moron he is--here's one more example.

At Last--An Actual Rick's Cafe

Casablanca has seen its first real Rick's Cafe open its doors.

The restaurant is named after the cafe from the 1942 classic film "Casablanca" which starred Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman.

The cafe is owned by Kathy Kriger, a former US diplomat and entrepreneur who worked at the US Embassy in Morocco's capital, Rabat.

Ms Kriger said she studied the famous film extensively to get the details depicted in the fictional cafe so she could work them into her real one. She's even got a piano player.

In my opinion, the piano is more important than the food! Hope his name is Sam.

Diva Drink

You know you're a diva when...you have Gucci cubes in your favorite beverage.

Yep, Gucci actually makes ice cube trays in the shape of little "G's."

Penile Piercing

It's no secret that Lenny Kravitz is a ladies man. The sexy crooner has courted the likes of Natalie Imbruglia, Adriana Lima, Devon Aoki and Nicole Kidman, not to mention his marriage to tofu goddess Lisa Bonet or the thousands of female fans who surely want to get close to his mojo.

Now Pagesix has uncovered Lenny's secret weapon, a little piercing he likes to brag about. Lenny talks about his "pubic piercing" to FHM magazine. "I've never taken it out. It's a hoop about the size of a quarter...." he says. "It hits the lady where she likes it and, because it swings, it can be effective in any position."

So, how many of you guys would be willing to go through that? I hope he fricking sterilizes that damn thing from time to time.

Is Fred Durst a Blogger??

Does Fred Durst have a blog? This sure looks like it could be it. (Make sure you scroll down).

Knight Rider

David Hasselhoff's dreams of taking his "Knight Rider" TV show to the big screen have hit a snag, after a dispute with his movie studio.

The Baywatch hunk has spent years trying to resurrect the hit series about a talking car and had reportedly lined up a studio to make the movie - with Ben Affleck being touted to play Hasselhoff's Michael Knight character. But the 51-year-old has parted ways with the studios after an "artistic difference". A source tells American news site The Scoop, "The studio didn't want the car to talk. David was like, 'Hello?' So he's switching studios."

I shamefully will admit that I LOVED that show. And I agree with David--Kit HAS to talk. One of them has to have some intelligent things to say, and it sure as hell won't be Hasselhoff.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh

I had a massage this morning at my favorite spa in the city. It was amazing. My muscles were so screwed up. The massage chick said, "You need to start talking about your problems and stop holding things in. Your back and neck are a mess." What was this? A massage by Dr. Phil??? I just sort of laughed and said, "Ok." She did stop talking after that so I could enjoy.

I'm SO sore--but good sore. It was fab, and much needed.

After the massage, I started perusing the candles, bath and body products the spa sells. I stumbled upon Elton Rocks. These beautiful crystal-like rocks are made of Egyptian resin that is imbued with scent. Created in cooperation with Elton John using some of his favorite scents, a percentage of the proceeds of these potpourri rocks directly support the Elton John AIDS Foundation. An international non-profit organization established in 1992 by Elton John., funding patient care services and prevention education for men, women, and children living with HIV and AIDS. They smelled SO amazing and looked so cool!

Not Quite Osh Kosh

Mariah Carey is eager to help your kids look like skanks!

Songbird Mariah Carey is planning to launch her own line of children's clothes. The "Honey" hitmaker has already branched out to create a range of jewelry and accessories and is now poised to expand into the world of kids' couture.

I'm sure these duds will be neither affordable nor tasteful.

Celebrity Yearbook

Can you recognize these stars from their yearbook photos?

Save Your Pennies

Saw "The Laws of Attraction" tonight.

My review? Save your money.

The end.

Punk'd Gone Wrong

The joke was on Ashton Kutcher and MTV's prank show "Punk'd" when they staged a mock arrest of the hiphop group The Black Eyed Peas at a phony brothel -- and the rappers' entourage started punching out the pretend police!

One friend of a band member slugged an off-duty cop hired to lend authenticity to the raid and another actor was tackled and knocked into the swimming pool.

You knew something like that was bound to happen sooner or later.

50 Years of Pop

Rock'n'roll has come a long way in the half-century since Elvis first stepped up to the microphone at Sun Studios. Here "The Observer" has chosen 50 moments that shaped popular musical history - and in the process changed lives.

Click here for the list, divided by decade.

Brandon Walsh is Engaged

Former 90210 heartthrob Jason Priestley has gotten engaged to galpal Naomi Lowde, a makeup artist. No wedding date has been set.

Glad he got over that psycho, Emily Valentine.

Here are some 90210 quizzes for you to try.

An Unlikely Hit

Chris O'Connell is a self-loathing gentile who says he wants to marry a Jewish girl so that he will not have to make a decision for the rest of his life. His childhood friend, Adam Lipschitz, offers to guide him into the world of — what else? — domineering mothers and subjects to avoid in front of potential Jewish in-laws, like power tools, Garth Brooks, Nascar races, Republican politics, Miracle Whip and "The Passion of the Christ."

Out of this myriad of stereotypes, two 30-year-old comedians, Bryan Fogel and Sam Wolfson, have written a play with the unfortunate title of "Jewtopia" that has become one of the biggest and most improbable theatrical hits in Los Angeles.

The show, which also stars Mr. Fogel and Mr. Wolfson, opened last May at the 99-seat Coast Playhouse in West Hollywood, and has been sold out nearly every weekend. (Nineteen folding chairs are usually hauled in for each performance.) Tentatively set to close in late June, the play is scheduled to move to New York in late summer.

Men and Their Roving Eyes

Sounds like a few women in Hollywood are having to put their foot down when it comes to their men and flirting. The culprits? and

Oscar-nominee Naomi Watts reportedly called off her romance with Heath Ledger after becoming infuriated with his roving eye. The "21 Grams" beauty, 35, was deeply embarrassed when, on a recent night out, Ledger openly flirted with rising star Scarlett Johansson in front of her - leading to a humiliating argument. Johansson, 19, was enjoying a cozy conversation with the "Monster's Ball" hunk in a Los Angeles nightclub when Watts discovered them and reportedly dragged him back to their table. British tabloid the Sunday Star reports that Johansson simply burst into a fit of giggles following the showdown, much to Watts' disgust.

Cameron Diaz has issued an ultimatum to boyfriend Justin Timberlake to cool down his relationship with Elisha Cuthbert or face losing her. The "Charlie's Angels" star, 31, has warned her toyboy lover, 22, to ease off his friendship with The Girl Next Door star - following reports the two have become inseparable on the movie set of "Edison." A friend of Diaz tells Britain's Daily Sport tabloid, "The final straw was when Cameron saw pictures of Justin and Elisha together looking very friendly. She's told him to cool it, even though he's told her they're just friends."

I'll be interested to see how these situations play out.

UK PDA

Over half of British adults have had sex in a public place, a new survey has found.

You're Not Getting Me on One of Those Things

Reason #4,345 why I do NOT and will NOT ride roller coasters.

I'm Alive

Thanks for all your well wishes, everyone! I'm alive. The final was LONG, but it's over, and I think I did OK.

A good time was had by all last night. I'm dragging today though. But, I can (for the first time in a while), sit around all day and do NOTHING. I'm going to try to clean my apartment--it's been neglected in the past weeks.

Can it be true?

I can't believe this day is finally here. I am about to head downtown to take my last law school final--EVER. Of course, I chose to go out with a bang. It's a 6 hour, 400 multiple choice income tax law final.

So, if you could, shoot me two prayers.

1) That I remember what I need to, don't have a blank-out attack, and that I pass.

2) That my liver survives the beating it is going to take afterward. Needless to say, my crew and I are heading out. And hitting it hard. 3 years of hard.

Blogging will commence on Sunday. (Most likely NOT in the morning).

Thanks for all your support, everyone!

(Oh, and one more thing. I fully realize that I have this massive bar exam looming over my head until the end of July. But, please don't bring it up today. I'm giving myself a week to enjoy this new milestone. I'll tackle bar studying soon enough).