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« Wax On, Wax Off | Main | Trump's "Do" Is Still In-Tact »

March 30, 2007

Have a Great Weekend! But, Don't Pee Your Pants

--Britney Spears and Kevin Federline reached a divorce settlement Thursday. "The parties signed a global settlement on all issues of their marriage and the custody of the children," Michael Sands, a spokesman for Federline's attorney Mark Vincent Kaplan, said. The deal was worked out in five-hour meeting in the Los Angeles high-rise offices of Spears's attorney. At the table were Spears and Federline, along with Spears's lawyer Laura Wasser and Federline's counsel Kaplan and Jim Simon. During a smoking break downstairs, Spears met with Federline for 15 minutes. (Sounds like they are playing ball maturely...)

--Actress Ali Landry is expecting her first baby. The sexy Fastlane star, 33, wed Mexican moviemaker Alejandro Gomez Monteverde last April and the couple will become first-time parents in July.

--Nobu in London was the scene of a scene the other night. Soccer stud David Beckham and his newly blonde wife, Victoria (formerly Posh Spice), were sitting near the table where former model Kelly Killoren Bensimon was dining. "Beckham was straining his neck to check Kelly out the entire time. Everyone at her table was commenting on it," a witness said. "Finally, Posh got up and left, and she barely ate anything." A rep for Beckham said, "If David was checking anyone out, it was his wife."

--U2 frontman Bono has accepted an honorary British knighthood at a ceremony in Dublin. The rocker - real name Paul Hewson - was joined at the ceremony by his wife Ali Hewson and their four children Jordan, 16; Memphis Eve, 15; Elijah Bob Patricius Guggi Q, seven; and John Abraham, five; as well as band mates The Edge and Adam Clayton. Bono received the award at British ambassador to Ireland David Reddaway's official residence in the Irish capital. Like fellow Irishman Bob Geldof before him, Bono is not entitled to use the title 'Sir' because he is not a British citizen. He enthused, "You have permission to call me anything you want except Sir. Lord of lords, your demi-godness." British Prime Minister Tony Blair wrote a letter, praising Bono, which was read out at the ceremony. He wrote, "I'll leave it to others far more knowledgeable than me to talk about U2's music - all I'll say is that, along with millions of others right across the world, I'm a huge fan."

--The Black Eyed Peas' Fergie is still mortified by the notorious 2005 incident which saw her accidentally urinate on stage. She says, "We had to rush onstage before I had the chance to go to the restroom. It was a very embarrassing night for me." The star, real name Stacy Ann Ferguson, confessed to her embarrassment on British TV series The Dame Edna Show, and blamed the incident during a performance San Diego's Street Scene festival in California on a lack of toilet-going opportunities. (At least she admits it now. Like anyone believed it was sweat).

--Religion in the technological era: many kids gave up MySpace and Facebook for Lent.

--"When I have sex with my husband these days, I fantasize I am with someone like Keith Urban or a petite, hot young woman." --Dolly Parton (I'm sure that made her husband feel awesome. I think Dolly's starting to lose it...)

--Drew Barrymore reportedly had lesbian sex with a magazine editor. Jane Pratt, the former editor of Jane magazine, claims she once had sex with the 'Music and Lyrics' actress. Pratt - who previously told DJ Howard Stern she had slept with a woman - said on her new radio show: "It was someone famous. I did have sex with Drew Barrymore. "One of my dreams is to return to Howard's show and tell him the truth about Drew Barrymore and me."

--I'm glad Helen Mirren won her Oscar already because I doubt she'll win one for her next role: playing Nicholas Cage's mom in National Treasure 2.

--As soon as we landed, we went straight to the Eiffel Tower, drank champagne at the top and just kissed and kissed. Then we went up to my suite and had tantric sex for at least 30 hours, ordering up whipped cream and strawberries while we were at it. As meticulous as I am with my work, I'm more meticulous with lovemaking. I like to do it for a long time. --Diddy, on his recent trip to Paris with girlfriend (and babymomma), Kim Porter. (Maybe he talked to Sting...)

--Halle Berry tried to commit suicide over her failed first marriage. Berry, 40, admits in Parade magazine - coming in Sunday's Post - that she was so miserable in the wake of her break-up with baseball player David Justice, she attempted to gas herself. But she pulled out at the last minute. "I was sitting in my car, and I knew the gas was coming when I had an image of my mother [Judith] finding me," Berry told Parade. "She sacrificed so much for her children, and to end my life would be an incredibly selfish thing to do . . . It was all about a relationship. My sense of worth was so low. I had to reprogram myself to see the good in me . . . Because someone didn't love me didn't mean I was unlovable. I promised myself I would never be a coward again." Berry also described her second marriage, to singer Eric Benet, as "really horrific." "We were in sex rehab after one year," the Oscar winner said. "I wish I had left then, but I was putting everyone's needs before mine." (What exactly is sex rehab? Is that like sex therapy?)

--Paris Hilton has been found in violation of the terms of her probation and faces a maximum sentence of 90 days in jail, the Los Angeles City Attorney's Office announced Thursday. Hilton, 26, was spotted Feb. 27 speeding down Sunset Boulevard around 11 p.m. without her headlights on, says L.A. Sheriff's spokesman Oscar Butao. After pulling over her 2007 Bentley Continental GTC Convertible, officers found Hilton was driving with a suspended license the result of her DUI arrest last September. In that case, she pleaded no contest to a lesser charge of alcohol-related reckless driving on Jan. 22, and was placed on 36 months probation. (I just don't understand. She's filthy rich. Can we not hire a driver???)

--Can you guess which celeb this is? No, it's not an old picture of Naomi Watts. No, it's not Sienna Miller. Find out after the jump!

It's Courtney Love! She's lost 44 pounds since she blimped up after rehab.

She said she "lost 44 pounds with 6 more maybe 11 more to go." A rep for the onetime Hole singer confirms that Love is following a macrobiotic diet, eating lots of vegetables and fish, and doing yoga and exercise to meet her weight-loss goals. Love also admits about recently having a nose job, saying that she has her "old nose" back. "I hated that nosejobby nose, it was like a little beak," she writes. Now, she says, she had had her nose "fixed."

Good for her!

Posted by Lawren at March 30, 2007 05:55 AM | Trackbacks (0)

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I really want to know how much federline got out of all of this ... and believe he was out to "get his" from day one by mooching off of Britney's fortune/fame ... lucky guy!

Write this down - the move to Hollywood will end the Beckhams' marriage.

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